I thought that New Year’s would bring new resolutions and new behavior to the chickens (and roosters) of Fernbrook Resort.
But I guess not.
What was it this time?
Well, the morning hours of January 22nd, 2015 saw another incident of peeping tomfoolery at famous Fernbrook Resort of Freelton.
Yup.
It was alleged by a human neighbor that one overly chubby male chicken (or rooster) was seen opening a neighbor’s shed in the dead of morning. Before THE sun was up. Grabbed a little something from the shed’s inventory, stuck it under his wing, and flew off to crow about it.
Which sounds strange.
Now it is a zoological fact that whenever sober, rooster’s rise before the crack of dawn. So this scenario sounds entirely plausible.
But it is also a zoological fact that roosters don’t use tools.
Roosters don’t have hands so they can’t use tools. Yes, roosters are incredibly unhandy. In fact it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that a rooster quit his job as a handychicken to hide the fact that he wasn’t handy at all. That it was the humans he worked beside that were handy. And that he is just all wings. Riding the coattails of his co-workers accomplishments and claiming them for his own. But when they left their job… he had to quit too. Or get plucked himself. Which would have been a massive blow to his giant waffle (or ego).
The thing is, is that it just might get worse for Rooster. Unless he wants to sit down over a bowl of piping hot Microwaveable Purina Instant Rooster Chow™ (now with extra larva) and discuss his narcissistic personality disorder that is.
If rooster is not going to turn over a new leaf, if he’s going to keep acting like a chicken, then he is going to get seriously plucked.
Cock-a-doodle-OUCH, my poor waffle!!!!
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