The Great and Powerful Rooster Returns to Fernbrook Resort Freelton?

The Great and Powerful Rooster Returns to Fernbrook Resort Freelton?

"The Great and Powerful Rooster is a night active day resting bird,"                                                                                       confirms Marlin Perkins, "that avoids snow because of its sissy nature."

 

“I wasn’t never even gone you sillybilly,” yawned the Great and Powerful Rooster, “I was just hibernating. I learned how to hibernate by watching Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom with your host Marlin Perkins.”

“Really. You really hibernate? Or are you just afraid that your footsteps in the snow will identify you and lead the Fernbrook Resort 5-0 to your coop?”        

“Hibernating,” replied Rooster. “All chickens hibernate during the winter. Just like all the other birds hibernate during the winter. That’s why you never see any birds in the winter around Fernbrook Resort. Turkeys. Penguins. Lions. Because we’re all hibernating. It’s a veterinarian approved fact.”

Perkins and Fowler's discuss the video taping of Rooster's latest antics.

“Really. So its not you playing all those petty, stupid and childish pranks between snowfalls? When the snow is shoveled or has melted temporarily away?”

“Nopey. Mopey,” Rooster smiled. “It must be some other chicken… I mean it must be someone else. That’s what I really meant.”

“Was that a Freudian slip?”

"I dizagree," zeys Zigmund Freud, " I zink zis Roozter doez made diz zlip."

“No. I don’t fall when I’m doing my petty, stupid and childish pranks. I prefer to run around randomly while quietly clucking.”

“Doesn’t performing petty, stupid and childish pranks indicate that you may be petty, stupid and childish?”

“No, no, not at all,” smiled Rooster beak-ily. “When others perform petty, stupid and childish pranks it proves that they’re petty, stupid and childish. And that means that I’m smarter than they are. However when I perform petty, stupid and childish pranks it proves that I’m smarter than everyone else. Because I get away with it. I am Great and Powerful after all…. I am Great and Powerful.”

"I am Great and Powerful," the Great and Powerful Rooster crows.

“Well if people forget that I’m sure you’ll remind them.”

‘Yes. Yes I will. Oh, and one other thing. I’m still holding my breath. And I’m going to continue holding my breath until I get a song written about me. And if someone doesn’t do it soon I am going to get even more Greater and even more Powerfuller. So much more Greater and Powerfuller that Neighbor Undesirable will have to be evicted just to make room for my giant oversized waffle.”

“Your giant oversized waffle?”

“Yes. My egg-o.”

That's no ego! It's a Fernbrook Resort management approved safety waffle

“ummm… I think that’s pronounced e-go.”

“Shut up.”

“sorry… ?”

“SHUT UP. Or I’ll hold my breath even morer.”

“Hold your breath even more-r? I don’t think you’ve been holding your breath at all. Or hibernating. You’re just chicken.”

"Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up"

“Shut up.”

“You’re still breathing!”                           

“Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up – ”

“If you’re not breathing than…” 

“ – Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up – ”

“… how come you keep talking?”

“ – Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut…”

The Great and Powerful Rooster's tough talking mid life crisis minion says, "I really like that cock," he said speaking fondly of the Great and Powerful Rooster, "And when that cock calls I immediately start coming. I rush right over to His coop. To see how I can personally serve Him. Its always an affair to remember," he sighed softly.