Hilarious Fernbrook Resort Freelton Mafia Engages in Feces Throwing Tactics

Hilarious Fernbrook Resort Freelton Mafia Engages in Feces Throwing Tactics

The feces throwing has returned to Fernbrook Resort Freelton… but we all had a good laugh over it this time

I was talking to my neighbors and they had the most curious story to relate. Apparently they had spent the day working hard to clean up their property. And the next morning when they went out side someone had deposited some logs of dog feces in a very noticeable spot on their freshly minted and tidy yard.

Moderately aged feces delivered by
Fernbrook Resort's Mafia

At first they thought a stray had stopped by to deposit its business. But on closer inspection the feces was hard and blackened… like it had been out in the sun for a couple of days. Meaning that someone must have placed it there. After they had just spent the entire day cleaning up.

Being new neighbors I gave them the 911 on the Fernbrook Resort Mafia… of which they were completely unawares. If you try to clean up your property and make it tidier than theirs I warned them, then the Fernbrook Resort Feces Mafia will deposit dog feces on your property – as a warning to stop tidying up.

OR ELSE!

The Horrible Boobs Mafia
in their Feces-Deliveringmobile? 

Well, they declared, that is just about the stupidest type of Mafia that they’d ever heard of. Trying to intimidate people by throwing feces onto their property. Who would run such a stupid anti-tidiness intimidation ring… some horrible pair of boobs they asked?

The intimidating Rooster Mafia of Fernbrook Resort Freelton

I replied that it might be a pair of horrible boobs… or it might be a giant chicken… a rooster perhaps.

Then we all had a good loud laugh.

Because who doesn’t laugh at chickens.

Or horrible boobs.

Pope Francis asks Chickens to end Tomfoolery at Fernbrook Resort Freelton

Pope Francis asks Chickens to end Tomfoolery at Fernbrook Resort Freelton

For many centuries popes have made a point of visiting Fernbrook Resort Freelton. But the steady decline in the standards and ethics of the canine ruled nation has disappointed the newly elected Pope. So much so that His Holiness issued a heartfelt public plea to it’s citizens.

"How much corruption there is in the world! I hope you have the courage ... to clean up Freelton and to clean up Fernbrook Resort. So that there is no longer that stink of tommyrot," Pope Francis began.

Pope Francis then urged members of organized flocks of chickens to turn away from their tomfoolery as he visited one of the Resort's most violent and tomfool filled neighborhoods on Saturday.

He was speaking in the shadow of a dilapidated mobile home in an area known as Feces-Town, an area so smelly that even police are sometimes afraid to enter, residents say.

Francis also spoke out against tommyrot in an address to a crowd in the notorious MethVille neighborhood, a stronghold of clans of the Gallus domesticus, the Fernbrook Resort version of the Freelton mafia.

"How much tommyrot there is in the neighborhood of MethVille! I hope you have the courage ... to clean up… and clean up Fernbrook Resort. So that there is no longer that foul stench of tommyrot," Francis began.



He next urged the area’s residents, which has often been the battleground of Gallus domesticus clans fighting for control of the tomfoolery and dog feces flinging rackets, not to let chickens rob them of their hope.

At a Mass in the clubhouse, Francis urged all of the former nudists to "react firmly to organizations that engage in tomfoolery or that act as tomfools with their tommyknocking and other crimes".

"To the chickens and all their accomplices, I, today, humbly and as Pope, repeat: convert yourselves to love and justice. It is possible to return to honesty," he said.

He has also said members of organized flocks of chickens excommunicate themselves from the Church, and that it would welcome them back if they repent… then go stuff themselves… with seasoned bread… before repeatedly basting themselves at 185 degrees for two hours and ten minutes.