Fernbrook Resort Freelton Proposes to Capture Infant Labour Market

Fernbrook Resort Freelton Proposes to Capture Infant Labour Market

Infant labour force proposed by Fernbrook Resort

In an effort to expand its economy during the increasing worldwide recession the tiny canine ruled nation of Fernbrook Resort announced this morning plans to employ low cost infants. The initiative is an effort to lure jobs away from China and India and other employment-stealing nations.

Nestor Spacecadet:
Minister of Pandering for Economic Development

Said the Minister of Pandering for Economic Development, Nestor Spacecadet, "I was watching 60 Minutes the other night and they had a segment on child labour in third world countries and it hit me... we have all these infants lazing around with nothing better to do than watch Mr. Rogers or Barney or whatever, why not put the lazy little carpetbaggers to work?"
And that’s exactly what the nation plans to do.

Confirmed Greenjeans, "We can use the tykes in mines, on assembly lines, deep sea fishing… there’s not much they won’t do if you tell them it’s what Santa Claus wants."

When pressed about accidents other nations faced when employing cheap labour, particularly fires in the manufacturing sector, the Lord Mayor of Fernbrook Resort responded.

Doc Ballard - Lord Mayor of Fernbrook Resort

"We got that covered," His Worship barked benevolently, "As a safety conscious nation we’re going to build our factories out of low cost asbestos materials. And if that ain’t safe enough for you we’ll also provide asbestos jumpers to all our little employees for a nominal fee… because when you think safety the first word that comes to mind is asbestos."

Protective Asbestos Baby Jumper

Asked where exactly they would purchase the asbestos Greenjeans replied, "from Canada of course. Canada is one of the world’s top asbestos exporting nations. When they’re not clubbing the hell out of defenseless seal pups they’re mining and selling asbestos to unsuspecting third world nations. Maybe one day we can be a third world nation," the Minister smiled .

Chimed in the Lord Mayor sadly, "And it's too bad we don’t have any seal pups… What I wouldn't give to.. "

New cars for Fernbrook Resort citizens!

Economic projections for the little nation indicate that if successful, every pot will have a rooster and every garage will have one of those foot-powered Flintstone-style cars.