Questions of Color Continue to Dog Fernbrook Resort Freelton

Questions of Color Continue to Dog Fernbrook Resort Freelton



Little Tommy Peststrip relaxes with his pet chicken 'Pall'.



“Momma,” lisped little Tommy Peststrip proudly, “I hates brack fries”

Brunhilda Peststrip searching for any
black flies in her neighborhood 

“It’s pronounced black flies,” corrected his mother Brunhilda Peststrip, “and I hate black flies too!”

Though it isn’t just black flies that tick off the nation of Fernbrook Resort – many in the pigmentation sensitive nation also turn up their noses at black ants, black sunflower stem weevils, black peach aphids, black twig borers, black potter wasps, black earwigs, black army cutworms, black tail bumblebees, black fungus beetles… the list it seems is endless.

In a world where the pigmentation of one’s outer skin, exo-skeleton or outer covering has become increasingly meaningless, in Fernbrook Resort Freelton it’s just the opposite. Colour is everything. If you’re not the right colour then you’re just not welcome.

From earliest infancy the nation’s youth are taught to avoid flies and other insects simply because they aren’t the right hue. That education continues in the nation’s many one room schoolhouses where black flies are banned. And on to adulthood where black flies are neither seen nor heard. In fact citizens are known to complain when they see these non-white figures travelling public thoroughfares.

“Hey,” defended Jethro Bushwhacker, “that makes us sound like we is all a bunch of no account no gooders... But we’s all like da blackfaced leafhopper.”

Jethro Bushwacker, "blackfaced insects are fine by me!"

Though that may be because they think that blackface is simply makeup – i.e. the makeup used by a nonblack performer playing a black role.

Martin Luther Tsetse

Martin Luther Tsetse president of National Association for the Advancement of Equality Among All Regardless of the Colouring or Pigmentation of their Outer Skin, Exo-Skelton, Scales, Feathers or Other Covering (NAFTAOEAAROTCOPOTOSESSFOOC for short) has long and loudly lamented the inequality and downright racism that secretly lives in the cotton picking nation of Fernbrook Resort.

Said Tsetse, “I dream of a day when all insects will be hated equally, a day when we will all be judged solely on the conduct of our character and the content of our soul and not by the crude comments and petty prejudices of a few unenlghtened souls." 

His Worship the Lord Mayor Doc Ballard:
"fewer black flies mean more business, its
simple economics!" 

The Lord Mayor of Fernbrook Resort, Doc Ballard, has this to say about Tsetse’s statement, “the head of NAFTAOEAAROTCOPOTOSESSFOOC said what? I don’t know what he’s been drinking but if he keeps spouting of with these outlandish statements he’s going to end up being swatted. Or else exiled to Millgrove. Screw you Millgrove we’re coming for you!” he barked excitedly as he began to run in a circle and chase his tail.